News Flash: Surgery
I thought my doctor would tell me I had to start wearing glasses… but he didn’t. At his little news flash, my mind went into overdrive and the challenges began.
“You need surgery on your right eye. It’s a complicated procedure where three tiny instruments are inserted inside your eye to fix the problem – removal of an ERM (wait! what did he mean by TINY? – THREE???) but we do this surgery often and with great results. First we remove the jelly that shapes your eyeball…,” he continued on but now my ears were not working any better than my right eye.
My mind quit and the prayers began. Lord, help me realize that you have this in your plan for me. Lord, help me trust the doctors. Lord, help me not chicken out and call the whole thing off. Lord remind me that I am trusting You and when I fear, then I’m not anymore.
I’ve had some stupid moments like when I looked up the surgery on YouTube. Another one when I started googling wildly colored eye patches thinking I’d skip the surgery and just wear a patch the rest of my life – actually thinking that might be a plan.
I’ve had some wonderful moments when folk have reminded me how much my Father loves me and how much they love me too. My wonderful husband encourages me all day and makes me laugh to take my mind off the whole thing (I’m so much braver when he’s having surgery). My precious daughter in law sent me an audio book to listen to afterwards.
One dear fellow shared how he actually felt God’s arms around him as he had brain surgery. Let me confess that bit of conversation convicted me for my fear. After all, God gave me two eyes so even if his plan is not the outcome I hope for, at least He allows me a great left eye (and all those colorful eye patch options) in the end.
My incredible cousin is taking off work to help Chris get me back home afterward. My wonderful sons, grand daughters, family and friends are praying and asking how they can help. A dear friend even called from France to encourage me! My all-powerful and loving Father is hugging me all through it because He knows I’m basically a medical coward (even if I can’t feel His arms like Billy Ray did during his brain surgery, I will know they are there.)
Often this week I think on the day I went into the operating theater with Inang, my friend from the village. The doctors let me wear surgical scrubs to hold her hand and translate their instructions as they did a procedure on her eye. I remember seeing her tiny little hand in mine and how brave she seemed in a scary situation so foreign to her. Now I think it was her lesson to me about trusting in our Heavenly Father.
Praise and Prayer Requests:
- for God’s presence all the time and His working His plan
- for the three wonderful doctors that helped find my problem
- for the wonderful surgeon that will do the work next week
- for all the family and friends who are willing to pray and help
- for my trust in Him not to waver even for a nano second
- for me to be a good patient and better witness